Poor Kirk. He thinks he can move up to second on the quarterback depth chart behind Robert Griffin III. Doesn’t he know he will never get by the original RGIII?
Beating out Rex Daniel Grossman III for No. 2 is crazy-man thinking. Grossman had a perfect quarterback rating in Saturday’s preseason game. Against the Colts. Rex is Lazarus in pads and a helmet.
He is more maligned than cholera and Ahmadinejad. But he keeps on coming. He has outlasted Donovan McNabb, John Beck, Chris Cooley, Clinton Portis, Graham Gano and most Ken Burns documentaries.
Rex is so indispensable Mike Shanahan actually re-signed Jonathan Crompton to play quarterback for one measly game because the coach couldn’t have Rex, his backup QB to the golden child, playing in the second half against Tampa Bay’s future dockworkers and nutritional-supplement salesmen.
I’m convinced if FedEx Field fell into a giant sinkhole one dreary Sunday, Rex would be the lone human crawling through the rubble, asking what down it was.
So don’t even think about taking Rex’s job, Cousins.
After Gano was kicked to the curb, Lionel Messi-style, Ravens reject Billy Cundiff made his place-kicking debut. So at least this night was important to him.
He drilled a 39-yarder in the first quarter and promptly booted the ensuing kickoff out of the end zone. Billy is really good at touchbacks, having led the NFL the past two years with 84. This has caused legions of frothing fans to exclaim Woo-hoo, the other team has to start from the 20!
But then Cundiff missed badly from 46 yards before halftime, a horrible-looking wounded duck that sailed farther right than Rick Santorum.
Look, maybe Gano wasn’t going to be Jan Stenerud or Mark Moseley. But he just turned 25 in April and was 24 when he kicked last year. Do you know star kicker Adam Vinatieri now with the Colts, had never hit a field goal from more than 50 yards at age 24 and had just a 77.1 success percentage at that age? Or that one of the best in the game, San Francisco’s David Akers, had missed two field goals by the age of 24 and made none? That Matt Stover was just 21 of 29 and Morten Andersen was just 20 for 27 by 24 years old?
Of the nine attempts Gano missed inside the 50-yard line last year, he had five blocked – and none were his fault. But because the Shanaplan calls for winning now so Mike and Kyle can make it to Year No. 4, they abandoned the development of the kid for the sure-footed accuracy of the guy who had a chip shot from the right hash mark to tie the AFC Championship Game and — missed.
I know. After Cooley was released, that story had no legs.
It also was an important night for the replacement officials, who are almost laughable trying to figure out the replay camera. “We’ll look at it one more time,” one of the zebras said to a chorus of boos before halftime. Yes, the future Foot Locker employee came back to announce that, no, they hadn’t got it right yet.